A church was looking for a new minister, and the selection committee finally recommended a young man just out of the seminary. Many older church members protested that a more experienced man would have been preferable. Committee members retaliated with the argument that a younger minister might breathe fresh life into the congregation.
At the end of the meeting, one commented to another, older member, that this marked the beginning of better things for their church.
“Yes,” the elder said with a wry smile. “Looks like we’re moving on to greener pastors.”

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I swear I don’t understand women. One moment my wife is all “Look at this sexy lingerie I bought for your birthday,” and the next she’s pissed when she comes to bed to find me wearing it.
– Brad Simanek

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A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. “Oh, we’ll never need that. My husband and I have a great relationship,” the wife explained. “He was a communications major in college and I majored in theater arts.
He communicates real well and I just act like I’m listening.”

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The state trooper pulled my bud Chad over and, after inspecting his license and registration, informed him that he was going to have to spend the night in jail.
“What’s the charge?” Chad demanded.
“None,” replied the officer. “It’s all part of the service.”

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Jean was using a power strip to plug her computer and other devices into. Windows was completely frozen, and she was unable to shut down the machine by using the power button. She phoned for computer help and mentioned the power strip to tech support. The tech told her to flip it off.
Jean replied, “OK, I gave it the finger. I feel much better. Now what do I do?”

That’s it! Have a great Tuesday!